Um... I'm a 14-year-old physical female, and I guess I've always had trouble figuring out what I am and what I like. I have been exposed to a lot of forms of sexuality. I know lesbians, bisexuals (which is what I suppose I identify as), heterosexuals, and gay men. I've seen so many things, and I suppose because of this I started experiencing sexual urges at a very young age- only maybe nine when I did.
My interests have changed rapidly since then. First it was a strong sexual desire towards females, then males, then both, and I've surprisingly found myself now interested in gay men specifically. But it's not just the standard 'Oh, they're so nice and clean and cute' sort of like. I know that I'm physically a female, I was born as one, but I don't feel like one. Really I… I've always thought of myself as neither gender, just as a person. I am who I am and my gender doesn't matter, right? But due to my increasing sexual interest over the years I've found myself wanting to be a physical man, so I could be the submissive in a homosexual male relationship. I'm so curious about it.
And because of this, I've taken to crossdressing. I bind my breasts down and dress in rather male clothing, and because I have a masculine voice I only have to subdue the pitch just a little, and people are convinced, and I love when they think I'm a male! And my boyfriend at that time- a bisexual male- I talked to him about it, and while I was still mostly clothed, in crossdress of course, I allowed him to have anal sex with me. And I loved it. It felt so good to be fucked like a man would be.
Since then, I've had a lot of thoughts about my gender. And it occurred to me, if I were to get a sex change and become male, do you know what I would do? I would crossdress as a female. There's something appealing about crossing the gender line. I hate the female body- I hate the overly masculine male body- but the slender, effeminate male body is just irresistible to me. I don't know what I am or what I want to be. I don't feel like I truly identify with either gender. I'm too masculine as a female. And if I should be a male, I may be too feminine. I just… feel out of the gender loop, and this is something I need help with.
Wow, I was so lucky to find this.
ReplyDeleteUm... I'm a 14-year-old physical female, and I guess I've always had trouble figuring out what I am and what I like. I have been exposed to a lot of forms of sexuality. I know lesbians, bisexuals (which is what I suppose I identify as), heterosexuals, and gay men. I've seen so many things, and I suppose because of this I started experiencing sexual urges at a very young age- only maybe nine when I did.
My interests have changed rapidly since then. First it was a strong sexual desire towards females, then males, then both, and I've surprisingly found myself now interested in gay men specifically. But it's not just the standard 'Oh, they're so nice and clean and cute' sort of like. I know that I'm physically a female, I was born as one, but I don't feel like one. Really I… I've always thought of myself as neither gender, just as a person. I am who I am and my gender doesn't matter, right? But due to my increasing sexual interest over the years I've found myself wanting to be a physical man, so I could be the submissive in a homosexual male relationship. I'm so curious about it.
And because of this, I've taken to crossdressing. I bind my breasts down and dress in rather male clothing, and because I have a masculine voice I only have to subdue the pitch just a little, and people are convinced, and I love when they think I'm a male! And my boyfriend at that time- a bisexual male- I talked to him about it, and while I was still mostly clothed, in crossdress of course, I allowed him to have anal sex with me. And I loved it. It felt so good to be fucked like a man would be.
Since then, I've had a lot of thoughts about my gender. And it occurred to me, if I were to get a sex change and become male, do you know what I would do? I would crossdress as a female. There's something appealing about crossing the gender line. I hate the female body- I hate the overly masculine male body- but the slender, effeminate male body is just irresistible to me. I don't know what I am or what I want to be. I don't feel like I truly identify with either gender. I'm too masculine as a female. And if I should be a male, I may be too feminine. I just… feel out of the gender loop, and this is something I need help with.